IT'S ALL COMING BACK TO ME...

I generally do not like having my picture taken. I've never considered myself very photogenic. I do, however, try to take at least one new photo every 5 years or so...sort of like a mile marker for how quickly or slowly my looks are fading as I age. The picture that I took at the end of last year wasn't too bad (if I do say so myself). As a matter of fact, it's one of the few photographs I've taken over the last several years that I actually liked. I was really quite proud of it, so much so that I felt safe to leave my house without using a disguise or having to place a bag over my head for fear of someone recognizing me from it. I even felt secure enough to update my Facebook™ profile photo without worrying about snarky comments. I took the plunge and posted my new picture. All of the feedback that I received was positive, and then it happened...

THE BACKSTORY:

A couple of years ago, a former coworker (a woman I'll call Anna) sent me a "friend request" on Facebook™. I've technically known Anna for about six years, though I haven't seen or worked with her for over two and haven’t really spoken to her in at least one. We weren't particularly close, but there really wasn't any reason I could think of not to be "friends." She seemed like a kindhearted person as I recall, and I got along with her fairly well... so I accepted her friend request. That was my first mistake. Mistake #2 happened about a few months ago... 

CURIOSITY KILLED THE CAT...:

Curiosity is a double-edged sword. After not hearing from Anna for over a year through regular channels and never through social media.... she sent me a private message via Facebook Messenger™. My instinct was to just ignore it. Besides...the message was more than likely just small talk...

'hi, how are you?'💬...

'oh really?'💬...

'that's nice'💬…

'see ya...bye.'💬.

I thought about pretending that I accidentally deleted the message when I tried to open it. But... curiosity got the best of me, as I wondered what Anna could have to say after all this time. Could it be that my new profile picture showed up in her newsfeed, and it prompted her to say hello? Only one way to find out...open it. As I suspected, the message started out with...'hi, how are you?' It ended though when she took aim and fired off a single shot...figuratively speaking. She wrote that she had just read an article about a reasonably popular character actor. The Internet did indeed have several stories and pictures of him because he had died the day before, but what did that have to do with me? Anna went on to write that she thought that he and I looked exactly alike... especially our eyes. As a side note, this actor had a particular look about him, which made him ideal for portraying gangsters and other rough-type personalities.

And there it was, folks... another random off-the-wall comment lobbed directly at my looks (see my previous post entitled Landing the Second Punch). I'd like to say it was totally unexpected. Still, as soon as I read her comment... memories of past conversations with this woman came flooding back. All I could say was, 'are you kidding?' It made me wonder what kind of vibe I was giving off. After more than a year of no contact... this woman was compelled to send me a message out of the blue, comparing my looks to that of a male actor, 20 years older than me, and dead?

BUT SATISFACTION BROUGHT IT BACK:

I really had nothing else to say to Anna after that...and even if I did...it wouldn't have been anything that she would want to hear. My lack of a reaction was probably the best comeback I could have come up with. If she meant her comment as sarcasm... an adverse reaction on my part would have fed her satisfaction at hitting the mark. The fact that she spent the next few minutes trying to walk back her idiotic statement to an unresponsive audience was mine.


In the end, I decided to take the high road and assume that Anna meant no harm (and maybe she didn't, but seriously...) Why couldn't she have at least picked someone younger, female, slightly less weather-beaten, and alive for the comparison?! 😕 It's all coming back to me now as to why I haven't spoken to her in over a year.

LESSONS LEARNED:

There are two lessons to be learned here...

1. Make sure that you know your audience before you say or put in writing something you might regret later, and...
2. Friends are people that you choose to have in your life. They should build you up ...not tear you down. Going forward...I will need to be a little more selective in who I choose to "friend" on social media sites.

Before I close out this post...I want to go on record by saying that my doppelganger was a very talented actor. I have no firsthand knowledge to the contrary, and so I'm sure he was also an upstanding guy 

(emphasis on guy). It was never my intention to disrespect this man if that's the way it appears. As to his identity, my lips are sealed.

My vent is over, and now if you'll excuse me... I need to log on to Facebook™... there is someone, I mean something that I need to delete... 😉

Me - 2019

 RESOURCES:

The photo entitled 'Me - 2019' is from this author's personal photo collection.

Clip Art: 'Zipper Mouth Emoji' by Unknown Author is licensed under CC BY-NC-ND

Clip Art: 'Thumbs Up Emoji' by Unknown Author is licensed under CC BY-SA-NC