Monday, April 27, 2020

WHERE THERE'S A WILL...


I've been spending the last couple of months organizing and sorting through some of my clutter. I'm not proud of it, but I've discovered what a hoarder I've become through this process. Don't get me wrong, I'm not enough of a hoarder to be the subject of a television show or worthy of a news story. Nor is there a need to wear a hazmat suit to walk through my house... but still, a hoarder just the same.

This Is Not My House!!
One of my favorite hobbies is genealogy. Anyone that has ever dabbled in this science knows that the accumulation of documents, photographs, memorabilia, and books is part of the fun of it. Organizing and cataloging these items requires a will of iron, and can take months or weeks. If you've been researching your family tree long enough, …it can take years. If you have multiple interests, such as collecting antiques, books, or crafting…your "clutter" will be multiplied tenfold. Add on top of all that, the day-to-day junk that we accumulate, and you've got yourself quite a mess.


My catharsis began by ridding myself of paper...lots of it. Old magazines with articles that I will never read or ideas I will never try. Stacks of junk mail, statements for accounts I no longer own, recipes that I will never make...you get the point. Papers were coming out of every orifice of my home. It's been driving me crazy for quite a while.




I decided to grab the bull by the horns so to speak, and try the Marie Kondo philosophy of getting rid of those things that no longer give me joy. So far, I have filled three tall kitchen bags with the shredded remains of the joyless paper stacks, and there is enough shredding left to fill another 3-4. The problem is that instead of holding on to paper, I now copy and save links to the articles & various websites. The snowball effect of that is...I forget I have the hyperlink, and now instead of physical clutter...I have a lot of 'cyber clutter.' On the bright side... now at least it is only visible to me...on my phone, iPad, and laptop. It's like shoving everything into a room, and shutting the door when guests are on their way over. I've never done that mind you, but I've heard some people do. Somehow, I don't think that is what Marie Kondo had in mind.

I will probably never become a minimalist, but I must admit throwing stuff out, giving it away, or shredding it into a million pieces can be very therapeutic. I've been putting together a game plan on how to approach the rest of my stuff...books, craft materials, and other miscellaneous dust collectors. My problem is...I like my stuff! I don't know if any of it 'gives me joy' exactly...but it does give me comfort.


Organizing my home is long overdue. It is one of my resolutions for this year. Sadly, it is a resolution I make every year... along with going on a diet and exercising. This time I mean it! It may take me the rest of the year, however, but I'm bound and determined to get it done!! After all, where there's a will... there is a way. Right? As for going on a diet and exercise... baby steps.





RESOURCES:
http://clipart-library.com/
https://konmari.com/






Saturday, April 25, 2020

READIN' & WRITIN'...




The love of reading was something that my mother instilled in me at a very young age...three-and-a half-months-old, to be exact. 

Here I am, in my usual "loungewear" during that time of my life. My trusty pencil behind my ear, and a book in my hand. Looking off into the distance for a quiet place in which to concentrate, I've no doubt that I'm on the verge of writing a spellbinding review of Peter Pan, a much-loved book. 

Other than the fact that I now have slightly longer hair, and have managed to avoid diapers so far... not much has changed over the years. I still love to read and write and spend a lot of time doing both whenever I can. 











Sepia Saturday Photo Challenge #517




Monday, April 20, 2020

LANDING THE SECOND PUNCH...


When you lob an insult, it's bound to land somewhere. Since you can't hurt feelings of an inanimate object… it's safe to assume that the lobbed insult will land on a person. One can only hope that the recipient has thick enough skin to cushion the blow, and if not, …here's hoping you can run really fast!

The story I'm about to relate may not be one that you might typically find on a genealogy blog or a history blog for that matter. It is, however, a part of my personal history, and so I'm qualifying it as a family story.

 If ignorance is bliss, then I ran into one of the happiest people on earth several months ago. Let me say that I do not dress up on the weekends to run errands. On this particular morning, I went to the hardware store to pick up a couple of those 3M removable hangers. I thought I looked particularly chic that morning, [said with a shrug]. In my standard weekend attire of jeans, a t-shirt, sneakers, and no makeup, I bumped into this woman that I had worked with a couple of years ago. She always seemed to be a pleasant individual, and so when she approached me in the store, I greeted her with a friendly smile and said, 'hello.' Her response to me was slightly less social when she said, 'hi, you know you should never leave the house without makeup' and proceeded to walk away. I was somewhat taken aback. The unsolicited comment from someone who didn't exactly look like a page out of Vogue magazine either, [and for the record, never did] was rude and insulting. 
  
I admit that my tongue has always been a little sharp, but I generally do not go out of my way to hurt a person's feelings, because I'm not too fond of it when it happens to me. It serves no purpose. That doesn't mean that I don't mutter under my breath or make snarky comments while being gossipy with a friend. After all, I'm not a saint, but I try to keep it to a minimum and, at the very least, not do it in public. So, shortly after the verbal vomit that I had just been subjected to...I found myself following behind for a few steps and plotting what I would say to my former coworker in response. 

As we were both approaching the exit, the moment arrived. In a clear, unemotional voice, I snapped back ...' well, you may be right about my appearance but, at least when I put makeup on...I know how to do it. Would you like me to help you with yours?' I left her standing there with a slightly stunned expression on her face as I continued to walk out of the store.  


I will never understand anyone that thinks it is okay to insult, belittle, or try to embarrass another human being, all in the name of "constructive criticism." When the shoe is on the other foot, however, and the "critic" becomes the target of the negative remarks, they are often astonished or incensed. I'm sure when she told her family and friends about the incident, she was the innocent victim, and I was the instigator. I will say that it was not one of my proudest moments, and I hate that she reduced me to her level of ignorance, but it did feel good to give back as good as I got for once.  


Maybe the moral of this story ended up being...never mess with a woman wearing jeans, a t-shirt, sneakers, and no makeup! I would have much preferred...treat others the way you want to be treated...with kindness and respect. Maybe next time.



  





RESOURCES:
https://www.fotosearch.com/clip-art/





A GAGGLE OF COUSINS...

Whenever family came in from out of town, it was time to whip out a camera and snap a few pictures. Unfortunately, not everyone got in this snapshot (I for one, wasn't born yet). The occasion for the gathering was to celebrate my Aunt Ann, Uncle Steve and cousin, Ronnie's arrival from Connecticut on Jul 15, 1950, which took place at my Uncle Lenny's house.


Back Row From L-R: Uncle Steve (Sember), Aunt Kay (Poppa), Uncle Charlie (Craig), Tommy Craig (on Charlie's lap), Mrs. Sember (Steve's mother),  Aunt Beth (Craig), Ricky Poppa (on Beth's lap), Grandma Poppa, Natalie Poppa (my sister), Marilyn Poppa (Mom), Patrick Poppa (in mom's arms), Aunt Ann (Sember) sitting on couch,  

On Floor From L-R:  Ronnie Sember, Uncle Augie (Poppa), Charliene Craig (sitting on Ann's lap) and Uncle Lenny with Prince the dog (is that a smile on his face?)

























Sepia Saturday Photo Challenge #516




Monday, April 13, 2020

TAKE A DEEP BREATH...

     Other than the obvious definition for the word air, it can also be defined as a way to express, vent, utter, voice, or broach. To make known what one thinks or feels. An impulse to reveal in words, gestures, actions, or what one creates or produces.[i]

     I was ‘up in the air’ on how to approach this week’s post. Do I take the word literally and write about oxygen? I can point out the fact that you can’t live without it. Or, sometimes, when it’s humid outside, the air is so thick, you can cut it with a knife. 

     Maybe I should write about the time I broke up with an old boyfriend over the phone because he made a promise and didn’t keep it. That was a deal-breaker for me. When he tried to call a week or so later, acting like nothing happened, I hung up the phone. I guess you could call that ‘giving someone the air.’ 

     What about a cute little story about the pair of socks that go into the dryer, and somehow only one comes out? The other one seems to disappear ‘into thin air’ or does it? I suspect there is a parallel universe out there that has a multitude of single socks, wondering what happened to their mates.

     A story on one of my ancestors, a great aviator with many adventures while soaring through the air, could be interesting. The problem is, I don’t have any aviators in my family and so no adventures to write about. Or... I could write about a hot air balloon ride, except I’ve never been on one, so I have no point of reference...  

     Who would have thought that a word representing something that comes as naturally to every healthy human being as breathing in and out, would be so challenging to write about?  I may need to sit back, take a deep breath, and let the air clear before I tackle this one.






Monday, April 6, 2020

FIRE!

If you have a fire in your belly, you might have an unyielding determination to succeed. To light a fire under someone is to encourage that person or persons to take action. Whatever the word means to you, it's clear that fire is powerful. 

"You're fired!" A phrase you never want to hear shouted at you during your working career. "Fire!" A word that you never want to hear shouted in a crowded building. Two different meanings, both harmful. The definition of the first one is a burning mass of negative energy exhibited by your boss (just kidding), and the definition of the second one is 'a burning mass of material.' [i]

Chicago has had its share of fires. Three that come to mind are the Great Chicago Fire in 1871, the Iroquois Theater Fire in 1903, and the Our Lady of Angels School Fire in 1958. All 3 are famous, and all are tragic. 

Perhaps the most famous fire to sweep an American city – and certainly the most infamous case of farm animal arson – the Great Chicago Fire claimed up to 300 lives in 1871. After starting in a barn on a particularly dry October night, the fire spread through the Windy City's unregulated wooden structures. It wreaked miles (and millions worth) of property damage.  The Great Chicago Fire was transformative for the city of Chicago, sparking political upheavals and restoration efforts that led to a population boom in the decades to come. Of course, it also changed the way we construct, insure, and regulate buildings – and not just in the city of Chicago. After the devastation of this historic event, City Council stepped up within a year to ban wooden building materials and require flame-resistant materials instead.[ii]  

 
Aftermath of Chicago Fire - 1871
Just a few decades after the city's Great Fire, Chicago suffered another fiery tragedy when the opulent Iroquois Theatre caught fire, with 602 people trapped inside. These mass casualties inspired federal and state overhauls of codes that affect public spaces, and these codes continue to govern our theatres and other entertainment and hospitality venues to this day. Like the "unsinkable" Titanic, the "fireproof" Iroquois Theatre proved to be anything but. Tragedy struck on December 30, 1903, when a stage light sparked and ignited a curtain during a packed performance of a play. Some exit doors opened inward, but the vast majority – 27 of 30 total exit doors – were blocked with curtains or locked with strange mechanisms. The audience panicked as many failed to escape, and nailed-off vents trapped the smoke and heat inside with them. [iii]

The Our Lady of Angels School Fire is known as the deadliest school fire in U.S. history, killing 87 children and 3 nuns. Survivors and family members of this tragic fire still mourn the loss of their loved ones 60+ years later.  If any good came out of this tragedy, it is the improvements made to school safety. Today, fire drills are a regular part of the school experience, allowing teachers and students to learn what the fire alarm sounds like and practice a safe exit. [iv] ,  [v]

In 1884, the Home Insurance Company Building, designed by William LeBaron Jenney, was the original site of the world's first skyscraper. It was ten stories tall with a steel skeleton, stone curtain walls, and an elevator. It was demolished in 1929 to make way for what would then become known as the Field Building. The Field building was erected by the estate of department store magnate Marshall Field. The 44-story building was designed by Graham, Anderson, Probst & White. Construction completed in 1935; 
135 Building - 1935
it was intended to be the largest office building in the Loop. It is considered to be the last true Art Deco skyscraper built in Chicago's Loop district. It was the last major building erected in Chicago before a lull in construction brought on by the Great Depression and the Second World War. On the fifth floor are 17 panels depicting Robert Cavelier de la Salle's exploration of the area. He is believed to have made camp at this location. Considered by some to be  Chicago's Empire State Building, the building was outfitted with mail chutes in the shape of the building and is crisscrossed by pedestrian bridges.   Eventually, the building would be known as the LaSalle Bank building or simply by its address, 135 South LaSalle. 
[vi] , [vii]  

I feel very fortunate that I have never had to escape a burning building. However, I did experience a close encounter. Back in 2004, I worked on the 14th floor of the LaSalle Bank Building located in the heart of Chicago's financial district. It was December 6, 2004, about 5:45 pm… forty-five minutes past my standard quitting time. I was going to stay longer, but I was tired and decided it was time to go home, have some dinner, and relax on the sofa. I got in about 6:30 pm.  Thirty minutes later, I received a phone call from a friend of mine, checking to make sure I made it home alright. I was confused. I asked her why she thought I wouldn't have made it home? She said, "turn on the news."  

A fire had broken out on the 29th floor of the 44-story building. The building was in the process of putting in infrastructure for sprinklers at the time of the fire, but on the night of the blaze, there were no sprinklers on the 29th floor. The fire was reported about 6:30pm and continued to burn until midnight. The stubborn blaze shot flames out of the windows of the beautiful art-deco designed building along with thick, black smoke. The intense heat from the inferno caused window frames between the 29th and 30th floors to twist. Over 300 firefighters responded to the fire. In all, about 37 people sustained injury, mostly firefighters due to smoke inhalation. However, several suffered minor to serious injuries according to news reports at the time. Fortunately, there were no fatalities. Bank employees had recently participated in a safety drill, about a month or so earlier. Those individuals still in the building knew what to do. [viii]  Firefighters found everyone and led them out of the building to safety. It's important to note that none of the stairwells were locked, and fire alarm announcements provided clear and concise instructions. 

A few days before Christmas, employees were allowed back in the building on the lower floors. The upper floors remained closed for weeks. The acrid smell from the fire still hung in the air, but lessened each day. Fire and safety inspectors had gone through each floor of the building to identify the cause. Eventually, it was determined that the root of the fire was faulty wiring.  Space heaters that some people had under their desks were piled up in the middle of the floor. I found sooty boot prints from the firefighters on top of my desk as they used it as a way of accessing the windows to repel down the side of the building. They stood on the wedding cake-like tiers of the building's design to gain better access to the flames with their hoses.

I don't know how I would have reacted had I been in the building at the time of the fire. I like to think that I would have stayed calm, followed instructions, and made a safe exit out of there, but I'm glad that I never had to find out.

I have attached a couple of documentary videos below on two of the fires related to this post. Both are interesting, as well as very sad. They're approximately 10 minutes or less in length, but very informative.




 RESOURCES

Monday, March 30, 2020

THE GREAT FLOOD OF 54’

In 1953, my family lived in a house on the west side of Chicago. My grandmother owned the building. My Uncle Johnny and his wife lived with her on the first floor. My Aunt Frances and her family lived on the top floor, and my family lived in an adorable, English basement apartment. All three families lived there for about a year before I made my grand entrance into the world in June of 1954.

From what I have heard, this house was in reasonably good shape, and everyone seemed to be happy living in it. There was just one slight problem; the basement would feel dank with the air heavily laden with moisture whenever it rained. There was no visible water damage; it was more of an annoyance than anything else. My parents knew this wasn’t going to be our permanent home, so this minor irritation was tolerated. Then it happened.

It was a bright and sunny day in mid-September. My brother and sister were in school, and dad was at work, so mom decided to take me for a stroll in my baby carriage. Once I had been safely deposited in my carriage, mom collected her keys, purse, and a light-weight blanket for me. Just as she picked up the coverlet, she heard a clap of thunder and saw the flash of lightning through the living room window. Quickly, mom ran from room-to-room, checking and rechecking all the windows to make sure they were closed tight. Meanwhile, I had drifted off to sleep…that is until the roar of the thunder wakened me with a jolt, and I started crying.

Our House in 1954
As if out of nowhere, the sky opened up and the rain came down in sheets. Water suddenly began streaming down the basement steps and seeped beneath our front door and up through the drainage system built into the floor. The sudden onslaught of water was too much for the sump pump, not to mention my mother. Fortunately, Uncle Johnny was home. The water brigade, Mom, Johnny, and now Aunt Frances each grabbed a bucket and tried to bail as much of the water out as possible, but it was coming down too fast. Within a few minutes, we were already up to about six inches of standing water in our apartment. In the meantime, my mother realized I was no longer crying, which seemed odd given the amount of chaos all around me, and so she went checking. There I was in my baby carriage, sound asleep. It appears that with all the water rushing in, my carriage began floating sort of like a houseboat not tied to the pier. The gentle motion had rocked me back to sleep. It was time for all precious cargo, i.e., me, to be evacuated. Thankfully, Uncle Johnny was able to pick up the carriage with me in it. He carried both the pram and, more importantly, me out of the basement...delivering both safely upstairs to my grandmother.
50s Style Baby Carriage


The rain stopped almost as quickly as it started. Unfortunately, not fast enough to prevent the damage it left behind. When all was said and done…there was about a foot of murky water in our apartment. It would take several weeks to completely dry out everything… assess all the damage and clean up the mess. The flooding had caused water damage to some of the furniture and draperies and of course, the carpet was ruined. All of our belongings that could be salvaged were up on blocks and strategically placed in specific locations that had remained dry.

During this time, mom, dad, and I stayed upstairs with my grandmother, Uncle Johnny, and his wife, Olga. While my brother and sister stayed on the top floor with Aunt Frances and her family, these would be our living arrangements for the next few weeks. My baby carriage survived unscathed thanks to my uncle’s quick thinking and would serve as my bed during that time. Everyone else slept on sofas or shared beds.

Most importantly, no one was injured, and our spirits were left intact, given our new temporary, if not to mention, crowded lodgings. With no faith that another flood wasn’t imminent, we knew it was time to leave that cute little English basement apartment. We only lived in that house for a few more months while my parents looked for our new home. My grandmother never really trusted that there would be no repeat performance. so, once the damage to the basement was repaired, she sold the house and bought a new one a few miles away. Grandma, Johnny, Frances, and their respective families moved in in 1955.

While I was there for all the drama at 3-months old, I only have second-hand knowledge about any of it. I do remember first-hand the downhearted expression that seemed to overtake my mother’s face whenever she spoke about that day. I don’t know if it was the devastation to our house itself that promoted the sadness or if it was the loss and damage of some prized possessions. Whatever the case, that day in September will go down in my personal history as the great flood of 54’.

Monday, March 23, 2020

LIZZIE WE HARDLY KNEW YA...

My Great-Aunt, Elizabeth Lufrano, was the youngest daughter of Michael and Saveria Lufrano. She had just turned 20-years-old on March 25, 1918. She was born and raised in Chicago, Illinois. Young and pretty, Elizabeth had her whole life ahead of her, that is, until October 19, 1918. From that moment on, whenever anyone spoke about her, she was referred to as "poor Lizzie."

Spanish Influenza. The thought of another pandemic of this magnitude is too horrific to contemplate, and yet, it almost seems imminent. The story of Spanish Flu hits home for my family. The same applies to many families across the country and the world.

The 1918 Influenza pandemic [i]  or the Spanish Flu, as it is more commonly known, affected 500,000,000 people around the world. The death toll is estimated at 50,000,000 but could be as high as 100,000,000, making it one of the deadliest epidemics in history. [1]

During the epidemic, Chicago reported more than 8,500 lives lost to the disease in just eight weeks. The virus popped up in pockets around the country in the spring of that year. It disappeared almost as quickly. The summer of 1918 was relatively disease-free. Spanish Influenza, did, however, gain a foothold in Europe and began to spread across the continent. Over one million American soldiers were sent to Europe to fight in WWI. In late August, when the infected soldiers and sailors returned from Europe to military bases all over the country, the epidemic swept the nation.

While not the first stop in the U.S., the Great Lakes Naval Training Station, just 30 miles north of the city, was the first stop for the epidemic in Chicago. Beginning on September 11, 1918, the first cases were being reported. Within a week, there were over 2,600 men in the hospital. Liberty was canceled for the men at the station on September 19, to contain the outbreak, but it was already too late. According to newspaper reports, the week ending September 28, saw 598 new cases of Spanish Influenza in Chicago and 176 deaths. The following week, over 6,000 new cases were reported and more than 600 deaths. By the end of the third week, ending October 14, the number of new cases had jumped to 11,239, with over 1,400 deaths. October 17, 1918, became known as Black Thursday in Chicago when 381 people died, and nearly 1,200 more contracted the illness in a single 24-hour period. [2]  The number of deaths was occurring faster than could be accommodated. The city ran out of hearses, and so passenger trolleys, draped in black, were used instead to collect the bodies. Precautions taken against the spread of the disease were primitive at best and mostly ineffective. Public funerals in Chicago were banned altogether, and private funerals were limited to 10 people -- including the undertaker. Public places, such as bars, dance halls, and movie theaters, were closed. Churches and schools remained open. Public spitting was cause for arrest. In the hopes of reducing rush-hour crowds on public transportation, local businesses were asked to stagger their working days.[2]

A Chicago man, Peter Marrazo, [3], was driven insane by the Flu. He barricaded his family in their apartment, and slit the throats of his wife and four children, telling police, "I'll cure them my own way!" [2] 

When it was over, there were approximately 300,000 people affected by the Spanish Influenza in Illinois. The last few reported cases of the disease occurred in the first couple of months of 1920. The epidemic ended not because any cure had been found, but because the virus mutated again. The deadly Spanish Influenza strain ceased to exist (sort of.)'  [2]   
 
Lizzie & Friends - ca 1917
Lizzie & Her  Niece, Mary - 1917





There isn't much information known about where or how Great-Aunt Lizzie contracted the disease. What is known is that she became ill on October 10, 1918, and died on October 19, 1918, at 1:00 PM. Listed as her primary cause of death is meningitis, which lasted for three days. The underlying cause…influenza. Lizzie was buried two days later on October 22 at Mount Carmel Cemetery. Since public funerals were banned, it’s assumed Lizzie had a private funeral, although there is no one left to ask. The address listed on her death certificate shows, 927 Cypress. I've never heard mention of that address, the name of the street has been changed, and the building is no longer there. Was that her home address, or an isolation center where she was placed after she contracted the disease? Again, there's no one left to ask. It’s heartbreaking to think that more is known about Lizzie’s horrible death than her life. What was her favorite color or book? What did she do for fun? Who was her best friend? Did she have a boyfriend? So many questions that will never have answers. As I work on my family tree, I will continue to search for any tidbits of information that may become available on Lizzie. For now, Elizabeth Lufrano may be gone, but definitely not forgotten.

Mar. 25, 1898 - Oct. 19, 1918



RESOURCES

[i]  americanexperience/films/influenza

1 https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spanish_flu
2Chicago and the Influenza Epidemic of 1918 Gapers Block .... http://www.gapersblock.com/airbags/archives/chicago_and_the_influenza_epidemic_of_1918/
3 https://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/lccn/sn85042243/1918-10-22/ed-1/seq-1/



Thursday, March 19, 2020

THE TRUE DEFINITION OF A GENTLEMAN...


ca 1924 or 1925
Someone once described my father as the true definition of a gentleman. It was not because of his social position, status, or education, but because of his character. He was a good man of even temper that never spoke ill of anyone. He was always willing to help another human being when others would just turn and walk away.  

His name was Rocco Poppa. He was known as Rocky to most everyone that knew him, though my mother would call him Rock on occasion. The nickname suited, as he was definitely the rock of our family, but to me, he will always be known as dad. He was born on March 22, 1916, in Bridgeport, Connecticut. The fourth out of the eight children (2 of which would die in infancy) of Isidoro and Theresa Poppa, dad was only seven-years-old when his father died. I asked my dad once, what grandpa died from, and he told me, mustard gas. At the time I posed the question, I did not know much about WWI or my family history. It seemed to make sense. There was fighting throughout Italy, and mustard gas was a poisonous gas used in chemical warfare during the First World War. Many years later, I began work on my family tree, which included studying many of the events surrounding the lives of some of my ancestors. I discovered that my grandfather was already in the United States by the time WWI broke out in Italy. 


My grandfather's cause of death was actually pulmonary Tuberculosis. I believe… though I haven't been able to substantiate it… that he contracted the disease aboard the ship during one of his crossings over the years. Once I found out the truth, I needed to understand how or why my father would think that his dad died from mustard gas?


Pulmonary Tuberculosis was and is a highly contagious infection that mainly affects the lungs. It's transmitted through the air by coughing, sneezing, spitting, speaking or even singing. It can last for months or years and can kill you.[1] Because of the nature of this dreaded illness, I believe that the children were told that their father suffered the effects of mustard gas poisoning to prevent panic and exclusion throughout the neighborhood. They had no reason to doubt that story.

Isidoro, Theresa, and the children moved back and forth between Bridgeport and Chicago throughout their marriage. The Poppa's all lived in Bridgeport, and the DiFoggio's (my grandmother's family) lived in Chicago. After my grandfather's death at the age of 31, my grandmother raised six children alone. So, she and the children permanently settled in Chicago to be nearer to her family. They would, however, continue to travel back and forth to Connecticut as time and money permitted. It could not have been easy for her, given that her eldest son was only 12, and her youngest was a little over 1-year-old. Without much money and many mouths to feed, the older children got jobs to help out.  

Seven-year-old Rocky and 5-year-old Lenny got jobs working on the back of their Aunt Grace's husbands' fruit and vegetable truck. Working on the back of that truck was not a pleasant experience for either of the boys and would soon prove to be unpleasant for their uncle as well. Uncle Carlo, as he was known, was a jobber in the local grocery business in Chicago. He would deliver produce and dried sausages (i.e., pepperoni) to area grocery stores. The days were long, and there was no heat or air conditioning in that truck. For their efforts, Rocky and Lenny were each paid a penny apiece for a week's work. From the story told by both my father and Uncle Lenny, Carlo would stop at home every day for a hot lunch and leave the boys on the back of the truck…regardless of the weather… each with a piece of Italian bread to eat, and that's all. After a week or two of this, the boys had had enough bread. Dad, as the older of the two, led the revolt. He grabbed a pepperoni link and took a bite out of it and spit it out. He handed another pepperoni to his brother to do the same thing. Six sausages later, they then started in on the tomatoes and peppers. When Carlo came back from his lunch, he was furious. He paid the boys for the week and never let them back on his truck again.

Engagement Photo -1943

As time moved on, paychecks somewhat improved, but it was the Depression, however, and so you took any job that you could get and were glad to have it. Dad was in school in the early 30s, and so any work that was available to him was that of a day laborer.[2]
  

There wasn't a whole lot of time or money for dating as we know it today. Dad, now in his 20s, had a healthy interest in girls, and with his movie-star good looks, …girls were definitely, interested in dad. Fortunately for me, there was one girl in particular that dad was genuinely enamored … my mother.   


Marilyn DeLio was the girl next door or rather…across the street and down the block. She was best friends with my dad's cousin, Lena. Since Lena lived in the same building as my dad, he would see mom now and then when she would get together with his cousin. As dad would say, she was a "real looker." Dark hair, hazel green eyes, petite, and beautiful both inside and out.   

My parents knew each other from the time they were children, but their romantic interests while growing up lay elsewhere.
   
Suddenly, it was the 1940s. WWII and the bombing of Pearl Harbor had just happened. Military service was inevitable. His romance with my mother had just begun with some minor flirtations when dad was called up in the draft. He asked if he could write to her while he was away, and of course, mom said yes. Dad would serve stateside for the next twenty months at Camp Campbell, Kentucky. My parents would keep in touch through cards, letters, telegrams, and the occasional army leave. By the end of August 1943, dad was discharged from the military.  After the army, Dad would become a baker by trade and a darn good one, too. 


1942

July 2, 1944
On July 2, 1944, my parents married at St. Charles Borromeo Church in Chicago. Over the next 14 years, they would have four children. The plan was that dad would retire in 1982 at the age of 66 from Gonnella Bakeries. He and mom were going to do all the things that had been put on hold over the years. But it wasn’t meant to be. 

One of the two darkest days in my father's adult life occurred on December 8, 1981, the day my mother died. The second one happened on June 4, 1987, the day my brother, Patrick, died in a construction accident. I had never seen my father cry before those two occasions, and I don't think I will ever forget it.   




Four years after my brother's death, dad suffered a stroke. He was able to regain some ability to speak and walk over time, so in that regard, he maintained some of the resiliency, which I always knew him to possess. He lived with me until a second stroke ended his life on April 1, 1999. Some may say that I took care of him, but I think in many ways, we took care of each other.
Dad was, without a doubt, one of the kindest, gentlest, and sincerest men I have ever known, he was the first love of my life. He taught me many things over the years that still hold true today. Dad taught me how to tie my shoes, ride a bicycle, put out a grease fire in the stove, and how to bake Italian bread to keep it soft on the inside and crusty on the outside. He also taught me what it means to be genuinely kind, not just by words, but through one's actions. I think of him often and miss him always. I love you, Dad. Rest in Peace.


Mar 22, 1916 - Apr 1, 1999



[1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tuberculosis

[2] https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/day laborer



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